Infuriation. Should Be A Word.

Today started out like any other day – beautiful, sunny, delicious Gevalia coffee in my stomach, some slight frustration with the Gerber program and it’s ridiculous illogical logicalness. And then I saw my face in a meme on my friend’s Facebook feed.

Let me preface this by saying that this meme thing started several months ago and I asked the person responsible for it to take it down. It took a fight and a half for him to finally concede and agree to not continue doing it. While I admit that it is funny, I do not feel comfortable with having my face plastered on the internet in such a manner, especially not without my permission and even more so after asking repeatedly for it not to happen again.

Fast forward to this week and said person remembers the “fond memories” of how “hilarious” that meme was and decides against my wishes to reinstate it. Yes, I laughed. Yes, I still think it’s funny – but I still feel uncomfortable in the same respect and for the same reasons, and so I asked him to take them down again. Nothing’s happened.

In fact, what happened was that I tried to talk to him in a civilized manner and have a civilized, honest conversation and this is the response I got: “I’m done talkin’ to you. You have a attitude with me that you don’t have with anybody else.” And he turned around and walked out with me trying to say that I’m trying to having a civilized conversation. All I wanted to do was ask ONE MORE GODDAMN TIME to take the pictures down.

There are several things I don’t understand about this situation. First of all, I do not understand what can possibly be so incredibly hard about respecting someone’s wishes after being asked repeatedly to do so. How is that a hard thing? What cannot be grasped about that? I’m pretty sure a kindergardener could probably understand that concept.

Secondly, since when is it okay to just turn around and walk away while someone’s trying to talk to you? Not yelling, not even getting angry. Simply trying to have a normal conversation. And then to have the audacity to be mad at them without a proper reason. Because I’m pretty damn sure that he doesn’t have any viable reasons to be mad at me for. And piggybacking on that, let me just say slightly unrelatedly that it pisses me off so much that he gets so offended by the littlest most insignificant shit, yet when he says something that is actually viably offensive, I’m basically not allowed to get offended because he gets offended because it’s “not that big a deal” or something, when in actuality, it is. Hypocrisy at its finest, folks.

Thirdly, I find it incredibly rude and audacious, not to mention perhaps a little bit illegal, to use someone’s photograph that they took (the one in question is actually copyrighted via Deviantart) without their written permission or consent. Isn’t that like property theft or something? Maybe I’m blowing this a little bit out of proportion, but the basic principle of this is that you do not use someone’s work without asking them first – regardless of whether or not they are your “friend”! That’s not right.

And neither is continuing to disrespect an agreement that came to through a drawn out fight that is happening ONCE AGAIN for the SAME FUCKING SHIT. That makes zero fucking sense. Oh, and refusing to read a written message that explains all this and telling me that if I want to say something I should say it to your face is the biggest fucking audacious hypocritical bullshit I’ve ever laid my eyes on. Fuck no. I tried doing that. I can’t talk to someone who refuses to allow me to say what I need to say. What the fuck is that? A very poor excuse for extraordinarily unwarranted pissiness.

Lastly, I really hate being angry. I loathe being loathsome. I despise succumbing to such base emotions and letting them consume me. This bullshit is not conducive to a healthy life and it truly and deeply disturbs me that I have someone in my life that infuriates in me such a way. But I can’t exactly just do one of those “friendship break ups” because we work and go to school in the same place and we see each other all the time and we have a plethora of friends in common. But I’m so fucking sick and tired of constantly having these tug and pull bullshit arguments and full-blown “fights“. I come home feeling angry and take it out on my family and other friends when I should be taking it out on the culprit person. Yet I can’t because god forbid anyone has the opportunity to say anything to him! Because that makes sense.

Brilliant Ideas from the U.S. Senate

I’m in one of those moods where I need to give a piece of my mind, politically. I’ve already discussed my view points on the whole birth control “controversy” and related topics. Tonight it’s this: quote President Obama on Facebook “Nearly every Senate Republican voted today to double interest rates on federal college loans for more than 7 million students.

My mom told me about this earlier and we both kind of stood staring at each other for the briefest moment before we both said “now THAT’S what needs doubling in this country, STUDENT LOANS.” I mean really. Politics infuriates me point blank. Politics LATELY is igniting a fire under my ass that’s like a blow-torch of outrage and irritation. 

First of all, do these politicians really have nothing better to do with their time than to come up with bills like this? Of all the problems in all the world, why is it necessary to raise student loans interest rates? Answer: so the rich can get richer, so the poor can stay uneducated and poor.

In relation, I have these 2 photos that kind of sum up my ideas and stance on this. The first is the accompanying photo from Obama on Facebook. The second is one of my favorite photos on Tumblr, ever.

It’s ridiculous that we live in the supposed best country in the world, yet so many citizens of this country cannot afford to go to college. Doubling student loan interest rates is just going to keep oppressing people. That’s a sickening agenda.


Keep Karma and Carry Om

Tonight I want to talk a little philosophically about karma and the energy you put out. Let me preface this by telling you all a story of what I experienced before lunch. This girl asked me to help this lady who often comes up to the library with a very bad attitude, with a computer problem she was having. First of all, it’s not my job to help with that since I don’t work in IT, but whatever – I try to help out if it’s something minor, and it was, it was just a printing problem.

She was huffing and puffing about having to print something 4 times cause the first three times the paper fucked up as well as the way the type came out and she forgot to put her name on her shit. I had her print again and it came out fine. She seemed worried that it’s eating her printing money and I said it’s only like 30 cents (60 for the 4 pages she printed) and she gets $50.00 every term. Unless you’re printing books on some other crazy shit, you’re really not gonna blow through all that fucking money by printing 4 goddamn pages. Well, as soon as I mentioned that it was ONLY 30 cents she got super offended and rearing her bad attitude monster, bitching at me that in my world 30 cents isn’t a lot. And I said no, in my world and everyone else’s worlds 30 cents is nothing when you have fifty fucking dollars a term to print shit. I told her I had $30 left and it’s almost end of term. She just kept going on and on about how I was audacious to say that 30 cents is nothing (in less articulate words, mind you).

I just walked away and signed out and then cried like a damn child in J1B’s cubicle for half an hour. I mean like a DAMN CHILD – I kept crying and stopping and crying and stopping. At one point I thought I might choke on my sandwich cause I was starting to cry again. I was already feeling stupidly emotional before she got all cunty with me. She was the icing on top of an emotional cake. And so, in terms of karma I want to say this: I try my best not to wish bad things on people because I don’t want bad things to happen to me (karmic cycle here, people) however, if you’re a fucking bitch all the time, and especially to people who are trying to help you out, then you deserve every single motherfucking bad thing that comes your way because you’re putting out that energy.

I wholeheartedly believe in karma, and so I believe she’ll get what she deserves. But it is not okay to subject other people to your negativity. Now, I am a hypocrite in this because I have done that before – HOWEVER, I acknowledge it and desperately try not to do that because it’s destructive to not only the people who get the fire, but to my own being. And I don’t want to live that way. 

That said, at the very end of my work day, HNI popped up out of the abyss again and I can’t even begin to tell you guys how happy that made me, especially after what happened today. And if you’re reading this right now here’s a huge thank you and the biggest virtual hug I can give you. You didn’t do anything except show up and I can’t even begin to explain how much that brightened my day. Here’s another lesson for today guys: Be someone others will swell with happiness to see. You never know how much you mean to a person!


Before I can go on working on my synesthesia paper for psychology, I have to share this highly aggravating and invalid argument I’ve been having on Facebook with an argumentative friend I have.

Earlier she posted a status saying something along the lines of she didn’t understand why her teacher was teaching mathematical models in her science class, and that science isn’t math, it’s science. So I commented basically saying yeah okay, but sadly, like it or not, science is based on math. And here begins the argument:

She said that no, it’s based on science. And I said no, it’s based on math because math is the basis of all sciences. And then we got into this whole 33 comment-long argument about how I’m fucking right [because I am and anyone studying sciences or mathematics knows this] and she’s wrong and she will not admit it. Because she never wants to admit she’s wrong. Because in her world, everything that comes out of her mouth is right, no matter how oh so wrong it is.

Then she decided, knowing deep inside that I’m so fucking right about how math is the basis of all sciences, that she would define science and math for me. Quote:

science: The intellectual and practical activity encompassing the systematic study of the structure and behavior of the physical and natural.

math: The abstract science of number, quantity, and space.

math is science! =D

Really? Because textbook definitions of this is going to prove your wrong point? So, not backing down, I wrote to her:

a pyramid of sciences based upon purity. notice how math is on top and all else follows. without math you cannot have any of the other things below it. math may be defined by dictionaries and other literary works as a ‘science’ HOWEVER like i’ve said, you cannot have sciences without math. you cannot have the books within which these definitions are written without math. life, in the state that we know it, could not exist without math. earth is located in space at a certain distance from the sun, which can be mathematically measured, because of this exact point in space, we are able to be alive. without mathemetics, we could not be. as several teachers from past classes have confirmed, the further past math you go on the pyramid, the more “wobbly” the sciences become. it all goes back to mathematics.

And included this picture:
 And we’re now having another hugely wrong argument on her behalf, further extending this in the comments on the above post. She’s just trying to win. It’s not even about being right anymore, it’s about getting the last word. Which is wrong. Because math is the base. She’s given many examples that she considers to be ‘scientific’ but when you really look at them it’s all mathematical, at the most basic level.

The latest was the speed of a car. And I quote:

science is the base. math is the interpretation and expression. math makes sense of science. scientific inquiries are followed by mathematical proof. you dont calculate the speed of a car and then wonder how fast its going.

To which I replied:

math is the base. you can wonder all you want about the speed of a car, that’s cool. that’s thinking. but in order to find out how fast that car is going, you’re gonna have to do some math. maybe install a speedometer which measures using math.

I understand what she’s trying to say, but it’s still wrong. As I keep repeating myself, you cannot have these things without math. You cannot think if mathematically speaking you weren’t alive, and you’re only alive because mathematically speaking, the earth is in a certain position in relation to the sun, and if it weren’t, all of this would not be possible.

There are numerous professors and scholars who agree with me. Because I’m right. 

Oh, and HNI got in on this earlier, helping me out with this fantastic XKCD comic that totally proves my point:

But the funny thing was, he was trying to search for it via the Chrome URL bar and he typed in www. before anything else, and Chrome was like “Hey you. Yeah you. You wanna go this highly inappropriate website?” like FIVE TIMES. I turned so red. He finally gave up and just went to the Google website and searched it there. It was rather mortifying. But yeah. That comic? THE FUCKING TRUTH.  

UPDATE: She deleted everything. The original status with 33 comments, the link trying to prove her point on my wall, and my link with the pyramid on her wall with 109 comments. LULZ. If I had known we were just going to throw logic out the window, I would’ve brought my party hat and popcorn. And I was just about to go screenshot everything.

The Repeater.

There are many things out there that annoy me, whether minimally or a lot, but there’s only a few things that make me distance myself from people. One of these things is repeating oneself. I cannot stand it when someone tells me the same thing multiple times within a given amount of time. This given amount of time could be a few minutes, hours or days.

I once used to be close friends with someone who’s nature it was to repeat many things they said multiple times in a given conversation or day. It came to a point where I started telling them that it was bothering me how much of the same thing I was hearing, and I would tell them that yes, I heard it the first three times it was said – however, it never sunk it. It went in through one ear and out the other.

Therefore, if I’ve told you that yes, you’ve already told me this – please, for the love of god, STOP YOURSELF FROM TELLING ME AGAIN, because if I’ve heard it once, and it’s really not that important, 99% of the time, I do not want to hear you telling me about whatever it is you want to tell me about again.

It really grates my nerves.