Answers

Today I went to church looking for answers to all the stress and anxiety and negative feelings I’ve been feeling lately. I was in a very good mood for about 10 minutes after I woke up while I was getting dressed. Then I went and asked my dad if I could take my mom’s car since hers was in the way and he rather rudely told me no and I should take my car. SOOOOO, I was going to just put her car in the street, as it was the most logical and easiest option (my car is always in the garage) and my dad followed me out and said he’d put HIS car in the street and then I could just move my mom’s car in his spot. Honestly this pissed me off even more. He didn’t have to get up from napping because it literally would’ve been so fucking easy to just put my mom’s car in the street instead of moving two cars. Just. Fucking ridiculous.

So I got myself to church. I rushed. There was no reason to, as always, as the whole standing up sitting down making crosses over oneself thing was still happening for a solid 20 minutes after I arrived at like 11:10. As I said, I went searching for answers. I got none. I couldn’t quite hear what the pope was saying (as usual) and the guys in the foyer where they sell candles were being loud as fuck and talking and banging shit around. It only aggravated me more. However, I did notice while trying to recount how many times Jesus is painted on the walls (18 last time I remember) that the painting of him that is right above your head as you walk into the church – he has a triangle (pyramidal if it were 3D) halo around his head. It’s the only one like that. I found that highly interesting and spent quite a bit of time pondering why only that painting was done like that and why it was done like that at all. 3 is a very powerful number, that’s for sure. I have a multitude of theories about it, but I’m not going to expound.

So while I didn’t get what I wanted in church, after hitting up Meijer, I decided I’d go to Ferndale to the Boston Tea Room because it’s always calming in there and I generally feel at peace. I was hoping I’d find some new stones to add to my growing collection. Instead I found a pair of sterling silver bee earring studs (for only $6.25!) that I attempted to use as nose studs but found the gauge to be too big. I also decided to buy Buddhist mala prayer beads made of cherry quartz. So in a way, I did add new stones to my collection. I’m still a bit bummed I didn’t pick up the ombre citrine set while they still had it. I’m half tempted to go back and get the lavender jade set, but I need to be conserving my money, once again. This was a spiritual thing. I bought them to find peace. I don’t need more. ¬†Although I will probably get more in the future, I’m sure. In a way, I made my answers today.

I still feel discord and I’m trying not to let it get to me. Inner peace and tranquility brings forth outer peace and positive energy. You are what you think. Etc etc.

So Today I Got My Nose Pierced

Today started out relatively uneventful. Alyza and I went to downtown Ferndale, and after exiting the Rust Belt, she clapped her hands, got really excited, and screamed “DO YOU WANNA GET YOUR NOSE PIERCED!?” To which I took a minute to reply “sure” to.

After trying a few different shops down there (one didn’t do piercings, the other was closed on Sundays) we found a shop on Woodward that was open, did piercings, and did them with studs (I’m not allowed to wear hoops in my nose at work).

SOOOOO, I did what I’ve been wanting to do since I was 12, but was too scared to do on my own for over ten years: I voluntarily offered myself to get a hollow needle stuck through my nose and carved out a hole.

It was kinda painful at first, especially the few seconds right after the needle went through. The girl had me close my eyes, but I opened them when the needle was still in and there was a burning sensation happening, so I saw it sticking out of my nose as she still had my nostril clamped out. It was kind of uncomfortable for a little bit and I remember thinking WHEN IS SHE GOING TO PUT THE STUD IN!?

But then she finally did and I was like holy shit I actually have my nose pierced! It’s been mildly hurting on and off all day, as expected. I never realized how much I flare my nostrils, though, until today. Every time I do it, I send a small jolt of pain to the piercing and I’m like oh! Okay!

All in all, it wasn’t a bad experience. I wasn’t freaking out like I used to freak out when I thought of getting things like this done, which only means that in about 2 weeks, when I might possibly be getting my first tattoo(s), I will hopefully also be as semi calm as I was today.

Now I’m just playing the waiting game to see who in my family will notice first that there is something different about me, and how long will it take each of them to notice. I deliberately didn’t post the above picture on Facebook, because I decided it might be better for them to see it in person, rather than find out via social networking about my recent body mod.

But really, I’m 22. It’s my body. I can legally do whatever I want.