Oh Charming, Where Art Thou?

I have officially decided that it is too late to exercise today and I feel like a giant turd for this decision. Okay just kidding. I just spent the last 20 minutes doing the Zumba Flat Abs work out. That is pretty much my favorite work out of all of them. It’s simple, quick, and fun. I mean, all of them are fun, but I find this one the most fun.

Anyway, I took some pictures of my nails today. I featured these two photos over on Vivography, but I thought I’d share them here for any of you who don’t know or haven’t been to Vivography yet. Essie Shine of the Times with Essie No Chips Ahead topcoat.

And now, for an introspective look into my continuously nonexistent lovelife:

I know I’ve talked about this before, but since it’s latched itself onto my brain for the past…god knows how long, my every thought is infected. I loathe it. I’ve been living this existence of love-limbo and I’m absolutely sick of it. Today while I was walking into school I remember thinking that whenever I get this frustrated, I have a tendency to start making moves in the hopes that something will finally work. And it never does. And I either get heartbroken or so discouraged that I entirely give up on any hope of love in my life, ever.

Yet somehow, someone inevitably always walks onto my horizon and pulls me out of it. And the cycle begins again. And it never ends the way I want it to. It’s like God or fate or what have you is playing this disgustingly cruel joke on me. Let’s me grab a finger, but never the whole hand. As if the whole hand is too high a privilege. As if it were poison. But I’m already drinking the poison. I’m addicted to it.

Perhaps that’s my folly. Actually, I’m pretty sure that’s part of the whole problem. I have to learn to let go so I can let these things come to me. Yet my ever-optimistic side has always and forever been holding on to the hope, to the idea, that maybe sometimes I have to chase these things. Except that I have always chased these things. And given up. And chased again. Repeat, repeat, repeat. How can I break something so ingrained in me?

Just swipe me off my feet, charming. 


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